anyways time is fake and nothing is real i’m just living my life from one halloween to the next
Tag: text posts
someone turn me into a painting or a poem i’m sick of being a person
My dumb ass wants someone to want me & I don’t even want myself
poor old granny scorpion-shoes. no one ever saw her death coming
it was pneumonia.
yes, her pet scorpion pneumonia, who lived in her shoe. tragic.
he shot her point blank
This was like reading a Lemony Snicketts book.
me, getting chased around my house by a murderer: alexa play what’s new scooby doo by simple plan
why do cats run through the house like they forgot to pull their dinner rolls out of the oven
Simple zest for life
sigmund freud made all that shit up for the views
Everyone Wants to Fuck Their Mom (NOT CLICKBAIT)
good: expecting “u cant touch this” and instead getting “super freak”
bad: expecting “sweet home alabama” and getting that kid rock song
ugly: expecting “under pressure” and getting “ice ice baby”
Hey, do you know that feeling of hitching up a long skirt so you don’t fall on your face when walking upstairs, and then you immediately become a wretched yet resolute Jane Austen character? It’s a universal thing, right?
It’s like resting a laundry basket against your hip and suddenly you’re a long-suffering peasant woman, wondering if you’ll survive the winter.
a shawl wrapped around the shoulders and you’re wandering the moors in a Brönte novel, feeling melancholic
Looking out the window at the rain and you’re a love-stricken newlywed wondering when your husband will return from the war.
It’s 2:30 AM and I’m in the men’s bathroom and someone was in another stall and I starting blaring the Thomas The Tank Engine theme and I literally heard them stop peeing out of fear
how do you know it was fear and not arousal?
I like to think we live in a nice world and not the one you just created
Emma's Blog 