Eartha Kitt as Catwoman in Batman (1967 – 1968)
Tag: batman
Bruce is a dad with five children so please picture him trying to call one of them and getting the name wrong
“DI – JASO – TI – YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE, COME HERE”
He just calls them all robin and the specific tone of voice indicates who he’s calling
#ok but this is kind of adorable because they all love being called robin#dick hasn’t been robin in nearly a decade but he LOVES it. he loves it#jason won’t admit it but he’s probably all warm inside because he’s included in the family#for tim it’s more normal depending the chronology and he doesn’t find it any weird#and damian’s immediate thought is ‘father is calling the True Robin™ i better answer’
Meanwhile, Stephanie always makes a confused face, points at self, and mouths “Me??!??” before actually coming (regardless if anyone else is actually in the area).
Harley Quinn
HeroesCon 2014 Sketch
Bruce Timm’s Harley is the only Harley. She got dem thighs, guys.
dc, idiots: bruce wayne can’t be batman unless driven by misery, so he can’t have love and/or happiness lmao batcat wedding is cancelled!!!!!
me, an intellectual: bruce wayne becomes a better batman because of love & the rare scraps of happiness he gets. his love for gotham, alfred, his children, & selina make him stronger. he’s claimed his family is his true strength and whenever he gets close to falling off the edge, to going against his values, he’s pulled back by the thought of his loved ones. bruce wayne needs and deserves love, and if the spoilers are true, mr. tom-fucking-coward-king can kiss my ass for making him wait at the pulpit for an hour just to get served a plate of pipin’ hot disappointment
So watercolor actually went well with me for once!!
wheres the fic where Clark Kent gets caught kissing Batman, and then gets hounded by the media every waking moment because “average civilian is dating Batman!!” and Clarks mourning the loss of his anonymity, meanwhile Bruce thinks its fucking hilarious, enjoy dealing w the press in both of your alter egos now, pretty boy, so Clark waits several months for the whole thing to die down before showing up as Superman to some party Bruce is attending and flying up to Bruce and going “paybacks a bitch” and just full on makes out with him in front of like a million reporters
#imagine all the criminals trying to kidnap batman’s boyfriend and clark’s struggle to look like a Normal Human Man#‘yes you have definitely stabbed me i am very stabbed right now’ (x)
Now here’s a Batman Vs Superman I’d pay to see.
another dumb headcanon: superman is nice to birds because of course he is, and helps out birds who are in distress. also he can fly around with them. birds see a lot more of superman than they do of most people, basically. the unexpected consequence of this is that the crows of metropolis recognize superman as a friend. sometimes crows just follow him around like a weird flock, or try to give him shiny things. but mostly please just imagine luthor trying to gloat while threatening superman with kryptonite only to have a crow steal it. or just, generally, lex luthor getting attacked by crows. if that does not improve your day i don’t know what to tell you.
“What is that?”
Superman followed the direction of Batman’s gaze. A crow had landed on the rooftop beside them, and dropped a bottlecap near Superman’s feet. “Oh! Hey Francis. Is that for me?”
“Caw,” said Francis.
“Do you have a pet crow?” Batman asked.
“No, I don’t have pets,” Superman said as he bent down to retrieve the bottlecap.
“You named it.”
“Not this specific one,” Superman explained. “I just call all the crows Francis.”
“… why.”
“Caw, caw,” said Francis with a flap of its wings.
“I don’t know. Just calling them ‘crow’ felt rude after a while. I’d name them individually but I can’t actually tell them apart. Except for Old Francis and One-Eyed Francis.” Superman tucked the bottlecap into a small pocket on the back of his pants.
“Why Francis?”
Superman shrugged. “It’s gender neutral. I don’t want to misgender them just because they’re birds.”
“Of course you don’t,” Batman sighed, looking back out at Metropolis.
“Caw,” Francis added.
“Do you keep dog treats in your utility belt?” Superman asked.
“Why would I do that.”
“… in case you meet a dog that needs to know he’s a good boy?” Superman suggested. Batman shook his head, but opened a small pouch on his belt and held out a small treat. “See, it was a yes or no question, I don’t know why everything has to be such a production with you,” Superman said as he took it. He tossed it over by the bird’s feet. “Here you are, Francis. Keep up the good work.”
“Caw, caw,” Francis said. When it realized no more treats were forthcoming, it flew away in a flutter of black wings.
“You’re unbelievable,” Batman said, shaking his head again.
Superman took his eyes off the departing crow to look back at Batman, and frowned. “You know,” he said, “it’s really weird seeing you in costume during the day.”
“Don’t start.”
“It’s like seeing your teacher at the mall.”
“Don’t think I won’t take care of Poison Ivy without your help, if I have to.”
Superman shrugged. “I’m just saying.”
But…what if the crows also recognized him as Clark Kent? This mild-mannered reporter who doesn’t seem to do anything in particular to the crows that would make them like him, but they’re not afraid of him at all, and they keep trying to give HIM things, and Clark being a nice guy, he just. Accepts the bottlecap. Says thank you. Keeps walking. Lois adds another factoid to her “Weird Stuff About Clark Kent” file.
Maybe he tries to convince his coworkers that everyone is friendly with crows in Smallville. That the farmers discovered how smart crows are and decided to make friends with them instead of chasing them off.
Maybe he tries to talk the crows into palling around with him as Superman but going their separate ways as Clark Kent.
Please imagine Superman on top of a building holding Clark Kent’s glasses and trying to explain the concept of a secret identity to a flock of attentive birds.
Accepted.
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