smallest-feeblest-boggart:

anarchetypal:

so i’m riding the elevator up to my apartment when the emergency phone in the elevator starts ringing 

and i just stand there for a second because this thing is like thirty years old and has never rung or even been used from what i know

but eventually i answer it thinking maybe something’s wrong with the elevator?? it’s an emergency phone it’s probably an emergency??? i dunno

except i shit you not it’s a telemarketer 

a telemarketer that’s as confused as i am when i finally interrupt him mid-spiel to inform him he has the wrong number and then interrupt him again to explain further that “uh, no, seriously, this is an elevator phone. i’m standing in an elevator. talking to you. on the emergency phone. i really think you got the wrong number”

“oh,” says telemarketer guy.

“yeah,” i say.

there’s some mutually-confused silence.

“so, this is my stop,” i say. “i gotta go.”

“oh,” says telemarketer guy.

“good luck,” i add, because telemarketer guy seems like he’s having an existential crisis. and then i hang up on him, because he’s having an existential crisis and won’t actually end the call, and because again i’m talking on an elevator emergency phone and, you know, this is my stop, i gotta go.

i’m just a big fan of the tone in which the ending was told

starkcontrasts:

losethehours:

badwolfandtimelords:

dailymarvelheroes:

“Well, I can confirm that that is Brad Pitt,” Reynolds said. “I still don’t even know how we got him for the movie. I just wrote him a letter, and explained what it was we were doing. And the sort of premise behind it was how do we, what’s the most wasteful way to use the biggest movie star in the world? And it was through a character that is largely invisible and worthless throughout the movie. And then just having him show up for eight frames of footage. And I guess Brad found that funny, we all found that funny. And he said, yes. And the next thing you know he came and shot for about seven minutes. It took him longer to drink the coffee that he requested as payment.”

Holy shit I’m crying

I’m thinking maybe Brad was up for some fun in his life around then.

What a legend